What If We Could
by Ashley-Susan
Summary: Four nights away may change everything for Sara and Catherine. Will their lives ever be the same again?
1. Chapter 1

**A long time ago I was asked to attempt to write a slash fic. Almost right after my laptop died and I stopped writing, now I'm back and thought I'd give it a go. Let me know what you guys think in the reviews.**

"I don't see why they couldn't extend the budget for us all to have our own rooms." Catherine huffed as she dropped onto the bed nearest the window.

"I assume you want that bed then?" Sara smirked at her pouting colleague as she placed her suitcase at the foot of the other bed in the room. "Come on, it's not that bad."

Catherine shot her a very unamused look. "I haven't slept in a single bed since I lived at home." The strawberry blonde ran her hands through her hair, making it slightly tousled. "They could have at least gotten us doubles."

"Think of it as an adventure." Sara grinned as she stretched out on her bed beside the wall, her eyes focused on the usual landscape style picture typical of hotel rooms that hung above the T.V.

"You're loving this, aren't you?" Catherine watched her colleague.

"Little bit," Sara smirked and turned her head to face Catherine. "Just relax. We're only here for a few days. Besides," she sat up and moved until she was sat on the side of the bed with her chunky boot clad feet on the floor. "You could be sharing with Greg. I'm sure he'd _love_ that." Her laughter was met with a soft pillow to the face.

She moved the pillow from her face and placed it on the bed next to her, without the obstruction blocking her view she saw Catherine smiling for the first time since they had found out about the sleeping arrangements. If anyone should be bothered it should be her. She was the one secretly harbouring feelings for her new roomie. Although she was a little nervous about what may come to light in their situation she was also a little excited. It wasn't often she got to spend any time with non-work mode Catherine and she was quite looking forward to the next few days.

Plus, seeing Catherine's little meltdown at the front desk had been amusing to say the least. She had half expected her to pay for her own room but she hadn't. Instead she had snatched the key off the desk and dragged her suitcase to the elevator, her heels clicking furiously against the tiled floor.

"Good luck." Nick had remarked as he and Greg had grabbed their own key and followed the fuming redhead.

Catherine had stood silently in the corner of the elevator with her arms crossed over her chest the whole ride up to their floor before stomping her way to their room. When they had reached the doors to their rooms, which coincidentally happened to be right next to each other, Greg had flashed Sara a sympathetic smile, to which she had shrugged one shoulder in a 'what can you do?' gesture before following Catherine into their room.

Standing from her bed Sara stretched her body before moving to her suitcase and lifting it onto the bed and opening it. She methodically went about unpacking her things and putting them away, she was placing her jeans into one of the drawers when she noticed Catherine had yet to move.

"Cat, aren't you going to unpack?"

Something didn't sit right about the way Catherine was acting; it was like she was almost scared to be there. It was a far cry from the woman Sara was used to, the woman who was her sparring partner and took no shit from anyone. Sara's voice filtered through whatever daze she had been in and she raised her eyes from her hands, which she had been studying for the last ten minutes, and met Sara's inquisitive gaze.

"Hmm, yeah. Yeah, I am." Squaring her shoulders she stood from her bed and mimicked Sara's movements, slowly unpacking her belongings into the remaining drawers.

Sara, for her part, was trying very _very_ hard to remain focused on what she was doing. She was absolutely not currently experiencing what she could only describe as a mild heart attack at the sight of Catherine placing her bras and panties into the drawers next to where she stood. And she absolutely wasn't imagining said items on the person putting them away. Not one bit. Her hands had a death grip on the tank tops she was currently supposed to be putting away but instead had them frozen in mid-air above the drawer. Her whole being seemed to have shutdown at the sight of the lace, silk, and cotton garments in every style and colour she could think of. Except her heart and lower regions, they seemed to be working overtime.

The sound of the drawer closing with a soft thud brought Sara out of her daze and she dropped the tank tops into the drawer, no longer caring if they weren't folded and put away neatly. She turned her back to Catherine's side of the room and went back to her suitcase on her bed; she grabbed her washbag and made her escape into the bathroom, closing the door behind her to give her some privacy and a few minutes to reclaim control over her body. Perhaps sharing a room with Catherine for the next 4 nights wasn't such a good idea after all, if she couldn't handle seeing Catherine putting her underwear away how was she going to keep herself in check when she was right in the next room showering. Or what if Catherine decided she wasn't shy, which everyone already knew, and got changed right in their bedroom in front of her? It wasn't like she could escape from her if she did; it wasn't a very big room. Placing her washbag on a shelf she placed her hands on the counter and rested her weight on them as she stared at herself in the mirror, she needed to get a hold of herself. She was acting like a hormonal teenage boy seeing his first bra.

She mentally scolded herself for acting like such an idiot. She'd done a brilliant job of keeping her feelings under wraps for as long as she had, she wasn't going to let a few nights mess that up. If she thought she had any chance whatsoever she would have taken it by now, she was no stranger to being attracted to women, far from it actually. She had been gay for as long as she could remember. But Catherine wasn't. Catherine was as straight as they came; her parade of past lovers had made that perfectly clear. And she most definitely had a type; assholes usually seemed to attract her. Admittedly there had been one or two guys that had been semi decent enough for her to actually introduce to the team and have more than a fleeting fling with but aside from those two she had dated some abysmal characters. And guys with brown hair. Almost every guy Catherine had dated had brown hair. Sara studied her own hair in the reflection. She didn't look that much different from the guys Catherine had dated, well except for the not having a penis thing. And that seemed to be pretty important; Catherine had never made any secret about how much she enjoyed sex and sex with men. No, Sara definitely didn't stand a chance, even if she did have the right hair colour.

Gathering herself she took a deep breath and headed back out of the bathroom only to be greeted with the sight of Catherine on her hands and knees with her ass wiggling in the air. Directly in front of Sara. Her eyes almost bulged out of her head.

"What are you doing?!" Okay, that was _definitely_ the voice of a teenage boy going through puberty. Squeak included.

"I dropped my earring."

Trying to keep her eyes from taking in the curves on display in front of her Sara cleared her throat. "Okay, where did you drop it?"

Catherine sat up on her knees and looked over at the woman still standing by the bathroom door. "By the door, obviously." Her voice dripped with sarcasm. "Where do you think, Sara?"

Shaking her head to clear any lascivious thoughts still lingering from her very pleasant view she shrugged her shoulders. "Gee Cat, what's that? Half an hour before you've snapped at me? Isn't that a new record?" Catherine narrowed her eyes in her direction, clearly riled up and more than prepared for a verbal sparring match. "Look, if I know the general area where it fell I have a better chance of finding it."

Sighing Catherine ducked her head slightly. "I was getting my jewellery bag out of my suitcase, so it has to be around here somewhere." She waved her arms around the space between the two beds.

Nodding her head Sara got on her hands and knees beside the frustrated woman and began searching along with her. "Why did you bring a jewellery bag? You have perfectly good earrings in your ears and we're only here a few days."

Catherine swept her hand aimlessly under the bed; Sara wrinkled her nose at the sight and silently prayed the cleaners here were good. God knows they'd seen enough hotel rooms to know what kind of things could lurk under there. "In case we go out. I do like to make an effort."

Snorting Sara kept her tone light. "Yeah, I've kind of noticed that."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Cat, you have enough shoes here to last you a month. Plus, you know, you always look perfect at the lab. Never a hair out of place."

Catherine smiled, seemingly happy with Sara's compliment on her appearance. She opened her mouth to respond when Sara pulled her hand from beside the bedside table with a triumphant smile. "Is this it?" she opened her hand to reveal one tear drop shaped sparkling earring.

Catherine grinned and threw her arms around Sara, exclamations of thanks and her being the best leaving her lips. She drew back and took the earring before standing up again and placing it carefully back into her jewellery bag which was now sitting safely on top of the small vanity beside the window. Sara remained motionless for a few seconds before finding the strength to move and slowly stood; she walked over to her own bed and sat on the edge taking her boots off. Once they were both removed she heard a peal of laughter from her roommate and looked over to see Catherine looking at her socks.

"Reindeers Sidle? It's July." Catherine looked thoroughly amused at Sara's choice of socks.

"Hey, just be thankful they match." Sara teased back as she wiggled her toes making one of the reindeers noses twitch and Catherine to laugh even harder. She wrapped her arms around her waist and shook slightly with the force of it.

Sara grinned. "Okay then, let's see your socks miss 'can't wear reindeer socks in July'."

"Sara, I don't know if you've noticed but," she motioned to her bare feet. "I'm not wearing any. Have your observation skills always been this weak? If so you might need to rethink your career choice." Catherine's face was split into a wide teasing smile.

Sara's eyes ran down Catherine's legs until they landed on her hot pink toenails. Something about seeing Catherine without her shoes made Sara realise that this was really happening. They were really going to be sharing a room and she had a momentary brain fog. Everything she had been about to say had left her mind and she sat there staring at the brightly painted toenails in front of her. That is until Catherine's fingers snapped in front of her face and her head snapped back up to look at a quizzical Catherine. She must have been thoroughly confused about why her colleague had just spent the last two minutes staring at her feet. Jesus, if she wasn't careful she was going to give away her secret before the first night was even over with.

"What's up with you?"

Sara shook her head slightly but was saved from answering by someone knocking on the door. Catherine's quizzical gaze remained on Sara for a few more seconds before she moved to the door and opened it. The voices of Greg and Nick filtered into the room and Sara sighed a breath of relief. She was saved from having to answer Catherine by their question of whether the girls wanted to go out for food since the real fun didn't start until tomorrow and they had the night free. Sara immediately jumped to her feet and jammed them back into her boots.

"Yes. Food sounds great!" she was far too enthusiastic but she didn't care. She needed to get out of this room and have a bit of space to clear her mind of all thoughts of Catherine.

"Sure, just give me a minute to change." Catherine looked between the three of them, all wearing matching confused looks. "What?"

"Cath, you look fine." Nick took one for the team and spoke up.

Catherine, smiling in response, tossed her hair over her shoulder. "Thanks Nicky but I've been in these clothes all day and on a plane. I just need fifteen minutes to freshen up and we can go." She grabbed some clothes out of the drawers and headed into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her and leaving the other three waiting.

Greg turned his gaze to Sara and smirked. Catching his gaze she cocked her head. "Something bothering you?"

"Aren't you going to 'freshen up'?" his remark was met with a swift jab to his bicep.

"Shut up, Sanders. Not all women feel the necessity to flaunt ourselves." She sat on the end of her bed and laced her boots back up while they waited for Catherine to finish changing.

A little more than fifteen minutes passed, actually more like twenty-five, before Catherine emerged from the bathroom again. All three occupants in the room turned to face her. "Wow Cath." Nick commented. "You look great." Sara silently thought that the words sexy, hot, devastatingly gorgeous were more fitting as she took in the sight of Catherine now wearing a baby blue tank and white skinny jeans with heels, her hair hanging around her shoulders loosely, but she wouldn't say that out loud. She wasn't signing her death wish just yet.

She completely missed the next part of the conversation as she tried to think of an appropriate compliment she could pay Catherine; before she had a chance though she was being pushed out the door of their room and down the corridor to the elevators while Catherine muttered something about her being totally spacey today. It wasn't until they reached the front of the hotel and were waiting for a cab that she actually regained her ability to speak and turned to Catherine.

"That colour…its nice….on you." Well done, she'd succeeded in making herself sound like a complete dumbass. She hadn't even managed to say it properly, it was all disjointed. Like she had forgotten how to string a sentence together correctly. She mentally scolded herself and decided she would just stick to keeping her mouth shut in regards to Catherine. Yeah, that was much safer.

The meal passed relatively easy. She had been seated next to Nick so she hadn't had to fight any of her urges by being so close to Catherine and the conversation flowed easy. Catherine filled them in on what Lindsey had been up to recently before Greg started to talk about some new hot chick he had his eyes on and before she knew it they were back in their hotel room and Catherine was in the bathroom getting ready for bed.

When Catherine emerged Sara kept her eyes off of her form, something she had been doing since they had headed out to lunch, and jumped off the bed, heading into the bathroom herself with her pyjamas in her hands. After she had finished changing into her baggy tee and grey cotton pj bottoms she brushed her teeth, washed her face and headed back out into their room. She risked a quick glance over at Catherine's bed and noted that she was already tucked under the covers with her eyes closed. Turning off the light she headed to her own bed and climbed in, debating whether she should bid the other woman goodnight or not.

Deciding it was a pretty safe and normal thing to do she spoke quietly. "Night Cat."

Her words were met with a few moments of silence before the words were said back in an equally soft voice. She smiled and closed her eyes, hoping for a peaceful and uneventful night.

Not two hours later her sleep was disrupted by something she couldn't quite place her finger on. She rolled over in her bed and warily opened her eyes; the bed next to hers was empty. Raising her head slightly she spotted Catherine stood looking out of the window, her slim figure silhouetted by the moonlight that was streaming in through the now open curtains. So that was what had woken her. Quietly she studied the older woman and watched as her arms wrapped around herself tightly and her shoulders sagged, Catherine let out a weary sigh and Sara sat up in bed. Something was wrong and as much as she wanted to go back to sleep she wasn't about to leave her friend upset.

"Catherine?" she kept her voice gentle so as not to startle her.

The other women made no move to show she had even heard her so she stood from her position and went over, gently touching her shoulder and turning her around. Catherine looked like she hadn't had any sleep and her eyes were wary.

"Hon, what's wrong?" Hon? Since when did she say words like hon? Now apparently.

Releasing a deep shuddering breath Catherine avoided Sara's eyes and stepped around her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

Shaking her head Sara grabbed her hand to stop her. "Talk to me Cat, you look ridiculously pale."

"I'm always pale."

Sara smirked at that. "Okay, paler than usual. What's going on?"

Catherine shifted her gaze to the floor by the bed. "You'll think I'm being stupid."

"Try me." Sara had her fair share of things that kept her up at night; she doubted she'd find anything Catherine said stupid.

Taking a deep breath and still refusing to meet her eyes Catherine spoke in a quiet, barely there voice. "Ever since….since I thought I'd been raped, since I woke up in that motel room alone and not remembering anything," she risked a quick glance at Sara to check she knew what she meant, when she saw Sara nod slightly she continued. "I can't sleep in strange beds, not alone. I…..just cant. I panic."

Sara suddenly felt incredibly sorry for her friend, so that had been why Catherine had been acting odd earlier and probably why she hadn't ended up paying for her own room. Maybe she had thought that having Sara in the same room would have eased her fears somewhat. But it hadn't. She was standing before Sara like a scared puppy.

Taking both of Catherine's hands in her own Sara pulled Catherine to her chest and gave her one of the rare Sara Sidle hugs. Holding her in her embrace she felt the small woman start to relax. "Why don't you sleep with me?" The words had left her mouth before she'd had chance to process them herself and despite the shock, she knew if it would help Catherine then she would do it.

After some wriggling and navigating they managed to find a position on the small bed that would fit them both comfortably, Sara lay on her side spooning Catherine from behind. Despite the intimate position she surprisingly felt no lusty desires for her new bed partner, all she felt was concern. As she lay there gently running her thumb along Catherine's stomach she felt the other woman relax and her breathing even out as she finally drifted to sleep. Sara allowed herself a few more minutes of thought before she herself closed her eyes and followed her into the land of slumber.


	2. Chapter 2

Sara was woken the following morning by a warm body fidgeting in her arms. The events of the night before were fresh in her mind and the concern from the previous night immediately came flooding back, she wished she could do more to take away Catherine's fear. Not yet ready to let her sleeping partner know she was awake until she had gathered her wits about her she remained still and kept her eyes closed. The smaller figure in her arms was however very clearly awake, she could feel the stomach muscles twitching under her hand and she had just pushed her butt back into Sara's pelvis creating a delicious feeling to settle in her stomach. Had that been intentional? It certainly felt like it had but was Catherine even aware of whose bed she was sleeping in? Whose arms were wrapped around her? She had been in a bit of an emotional state the night before and Sara couldn't be sure that she recalled what had happened. Taking a chance she moved her hand slightly higher on the woman's torso until it was resting just under her left breast. She immediately felt the previously fidgeting body instantly stiffen and the other woman hold her breath. Still mimicking sleep Sara kept her hand in its place, she knew what she was doing was wrong but she desperately wanted to keep this moment in her mind forever. How many opportunities would she have to hold Catherine Willows in her arms? She couldn't imagine very many scenarios where such a thing would happen. Sara felt her heart leap as Catherine's fingers very lightly traced over the hand now resting on her chest very close to her breast. Now that _was_ intentional. Perhaps her fantasies weren't so farfetched. Perhaps Catherine was more receptive to the idea of being romantically involved with a woman than Sara had previously thought.

Deciding that she could either live her life in love with a woman who never knew and have her heart broken every time she saw her with a new lover or take a chance and see what would happen, she leant forward and very lightly brushed her lips over the exposed skin of Catherine's shoulder. There was no mistaking the intimacy of the kiss. Friends didn't kiss like that, and especially not after waking up in bed together. But she'd done it, she had taken the leap and so far she hadn't crashed. Catherine hadn't moved or said a word but she hadn't lept out of bed screaming at her for pulling such a move. That had to be a good thing right?

She didn't know whether Catherine was pretending to be asleep or just didn't know how to respond so Sara, feeling that now she'd made the initial leap she may as well go all out, brushed her nose against the sensitive skin behind Catherine's ear and whispered. "I know you're awake."

The response was immediate, Catherine's hand that had stilled over Sara's the moment her lips had touched her skin moved away instantly and she pulled herself away to the other side of the small bed. Sara watched as Catherine scrambled out of bed and ran into the bathroom without even looking at her once, it seemed as if the sound of Sara's voice had broken whatever spell had been cast over them and Catherine had bolted.

Had she freaked her out? Perhaps the kiss had been a step too far. Lying back on the bed she blew out a breath and rested her hands over her face berating herself for being such an idiot. She had gone too far and had made Catherine feel uncomfortable. She'd just have to apologise and hope that Catherine would accept it and not report her to Ecklie or Grissom for inappropriate behaviour.

She was still lay in the same position when the bathroom door reopened and Catherine emerged, her gaze still avoiding Sara. Moving her hands from her face Sara watched as she moved to the drawers and grabbed some clean underwear and clothes before going back to the bathroom, pausing in the doorway briefly before shaking her head and going back in, once again closing the door. This was going to be incredibly awkward. How were they supposed to share a room for another 3 nights if Catherine couldn't even look at her?

When Catherine next emerged, freshly showered and fully dressed, Sara was sitting on the end of her bed waiting. Catherine's eyes briefly glanced at her before they moved away and she went to her side of the room and began drying her hair at the vanity. Sara, knowing it was a delay tactic to avoid talking to her decided she too could do with a few more minutes to gather what she was going to say to explain her behaviour. Standing from the bed she stretched her long body, cracking her back in the process, and once again cast her eyes to where Catherine was sat. She smiled slightly at the sight she was greeted with, Catherine's hand holding the hairdryer had stilled and was hovering somewhere between the vanity and her head while her eyes were glued to Sara's exposed stomach in the mirror. Sara smirked feeling happy that she had gotten hot in the small bed and had changed her baggy t-shirt to a sports bra in the middle of the night. Catherine certainly seemed to be enjoying what she was seeing so maybe, just maybe, she wasn't repulsed by Sara's earlier kiss but rather she was confused about how she felt. Feeling suddenly brave Sara dragged her hand over the place where Catherine's eyes were currently glued and let out a quiet groan. The response was immediate and Catherine's eyes flew up to meet hers, all wide and blue. Sara, not one to back down from anything, met her stare with her intense brown eyes and cocked her head to the side slightly with a smirk. Her smirk grew when she saw the pink tint slowly making its way over Catherine's cheeks at being busted ogling. Sara, feeling incredibly empowered with the knowledge Catherine was certainly interested even if she wouldn't admit it, winked at the blushing blonde and grabbed her own clothes before going into the bathroom. Oh yeah, she was definitely interested and Sara was going to milk it for all it was worth.

There hadn't been any time to talk after they had dressed, Greg had knocked on their door and reminded them that if they wanted to have breakfast before the seminars started they would have to hurry up. So they had left, had a quick breakfast and headed to the first seminar of the day. Sara, still on a high from catching Catherine admiring her body, took the seat beside Catherine's in the hall. Catherine, for her part, had made an admirable effort not to react to anything Sara had said or done since they left the hotel room. She had made a point of sitting beside Greg in the diner and had barely said anything unless something was directed at her. Even then her replies and been brief. So, settling in her seat, Sara flicked through the information booklet they had been given upon entering. Catherine was beside her doing the same.

"Did you like what you saw?" Sara's eyes were still glued to the booklet in front of her but unbeknownst to her companion her attention was fully on her.

Catherine's head snapped in her direction with a look of complete shock on her face. It only took her a second to compose herself and look at the booklet grasped tightly in her sweaty hands. "I don't know what you mean."

Mindful of the boys talking beside her Sara kept her voice low. "You can deny it all you want Cat, I saw you looking." She smirked and risked a quick glance at the woman sitting beside her. "Tell me, did you enjoy it?" She saw Catherine clench her jaw and her eyes dart around the room, possibly looking for a way to escape this conversation. Leaning towards her slightly Sara lowered her voice more. "I know I did." This time Catherine's gaze locked onto hers and seductive brown eyes met sparkling blue ones.

Taking another risk Sara lightly placed her hand beside her leg on the seat, between hers and Catherine's, and let her fingers brush against the outside of Catherine's thigh. She felt the leg beside her fingers twitch and noted the way Catherine's hands clenched the booklet, almost crumpling it.

"I don't know what game you're playing Sidle but you better stop it. Now." Catherine had clearly attempted to make her voice sound stern but Sara picked up on the undercurrent of nerves. Oh she definitely had some kind of interest in this.

"I'm not playing a game Catherine," she let her name roll off her tongue like liquid silk. "I'm very serious. Now, you haven't answered me. Did you enjoy what you saw?" Again her fingers brushed against her leg.

Before Catherine could respond Greg leaned over to their seats. "Hey, anyone need a drink? I'm going to grab a bottle of water before this thing starts." He looked from Sara to Catherine. "You alright Cath? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Sara smirked and turned to Greg. "She didn't sleep well." Lifting her hand she placed it fully on the blonde's thigh and gave a squeeze.

Greg accepting the answer simply nodded. "So, drinks?" Sara shook her head and held up her own bottle.

Catherine, too lost in her own head, stared straight ahead. After getting no response Sara squeezed her thigh getting her attention. "Do you want something wet?" Catherine's eyes widened as she looked at Sara, clearly not missing the undertone to Sara's voice. She shook her head quickly and shifted in her seat making Sara chuckle. After Greg had left Sara moved her lips to beside Catherine's ear. "You're cute when you blush like that."

Before she had a chance to continue Catherine was out of her seat and grabbing her bag, her eyes on Nick as she spoke. "You can fill me in later." And she was gone. Sara simply looked at Nick and shrugged as if she had no clue what was bothering the blonde.

The rest of the morning passed relatively slowly, Sara couldn't completely focus on what was being said but she did manage to take a few notes that had caught her interest. After the first lecture of the day was over she told the boys she was heading for a walk after being stuck inside all day and made her way towards the park over the road. As she walked she went over the day's events, she knew that she should maybe approach Catherine with a little more tact but she was having far too much fun seeing her squirm for once. And if she was honest it was incredibly liberating to be the one in charge. And despite Catherine leaving she had a distinct feeling that Catherine was liking it too, she just couldn't admit it. By the end of this week she would know for certain if Catherine was into this or not. She would make it her mission.

After her long walk she felt much better and headed to the next lecture with a much clearer head. When she entered the hall she smiled, Catherine was back but had seated herself between Greg and another woman leaving no room for Sara to sit near her. Taking the free seat beside Nick Sara took a sip of her drink and leant around Nick to look at Catherine.

"Are you feeling better?"

Catherine turned her intense blue eyes to her and offered the smallest of smiles. "Yes." Sara knew that was all she was going to get out of her and smiled as she sat back in her seat.

By the time they were done for the day everyone was tired and fed up of being stuck inside all day listening to someone drone on and on. The boys had asked if they had wanted to join them at the bar for a few drinks before going to dinner and then bed, Sara had readily agreed but Catherine had declined and said she was going to make use of the hotel spa and get a massage. Sara didn't let it show but she had been slightly disappointed that she wouldn't get to spend the evening in the blondes company, possibly teasing her some more.

The night went quickly and they ended up having more than a few beers and by the time Sara made it back to her room Catherine was in bed with her eyes closed. Quietly Sara approached the seemingly sleeping woman and brushed her fingers through her golden hair.

"Oh Cat, why can't you see how much you mean to me?" Her voice barely broke the silence in the room. Placing a quick kiss to the top of her golden hair Sara got ready for bed and switched off the light before climbing under the covers.

She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow and missed Catherine opening her eyes and looking at her with blue eyes swimming with emotion.


	3. Chapter 3

**So sorry it has taken me so long to write this for you guys. I have had it half written since the last chapter was posted but then my kids broke up from school and all my time went to them, then I had a few family emergencies which resulted in two family members ending up in hospital.**

The following morning broke with Catherine already awake by the time Sara pulled herself from her slumber. She had already showered and dressed for the day and was sat in the chair from the vanity which she had pulled to the window and sat gazing out of. Sara untangled herself from the mess of sheets and stood up, feeling surprisingly fresh considering her alcohol intake the night before. She stretched her back and let out a yawn before making her way to the bathroom to freshen up, Catherine's concentration never leaving the view from the window.

When she emerged, freshly showered and wrapped in a fluffy navy blue towel she had brought with her, Catherine was still in the same spot looking out the window.

"Did you sleep okay?" Sara made her way back to her bed and perched on the end with her towel wrapped firmly around her body. She was surprised Catherine had slept in her own bed given the first nights events and Catherine's confession. She had consumed so much alcohol in preparation of Catherine wanting to share her bed again and in the hopes that it would knock her out and she could sleep without embarrassing herself.

"Hmm, not really…" Catherine turned in her seat and faced the brunette who was now rubbing her hair with another towel to attempt to dry it.

When Sara's eyes connected with Catherine's she noticed something in them that she had never seen in Catherine's eyes before, it seemed like she was afraid of Sara. Like she didn't know who she was anymore. Seemingly gathering her courage Catherine took a deep breath and stood from her chair to face Sara fully.

"Why are you doing this? Is it some bet you have going? Let's see how easy Catherine really is, is that it?"

"What?" Sara stopped rubbing her hair and dropped the towel to her lap, trying to understand Catherine's rambling.

"What I want to know is why you? Why is it you trying to get in my pants? Why didn't they choose one of the boys? Surely that would be the more sensible option. Catherine's an ex stripper with a shady past so she's got to be an easy lay. Right?"

Sara couldn't believe what she was hearing. Did Catherine really think she would do something like that? Taking a deep breath to calm herself, the last thing she needed was for them get into a fight; she tightened her towel around her body and met Catherine's stare.

"There's no bet Catherine. I have no ulterior motive."

"So you're what? Gay?" At Sara's nod in the affirmative Catherine seemed to lose the fight within her. "Oh."

Again Sara nodded but this time she was on the same train as Catherine and knew what was going on. She gathered all her courage and stood from the bed, moving across the room until she was stood toe to toe with Catherine.

"Yes Catherine, I'm gay. The biggest dyke in the village. Does it make you happy to know that I've spent years wanting you? Does it please you to know that I've wanted to do this for a very long time?" She asked before pressing her lips to the enticing ones before her.

The kiss started out as only the press of lips against lips but when Catherine didn't pull away Sara's confidence grew, she placed her left hand on Catherine's hip while her other tangled itself in the golden locks she had wanted to run her fingers through for so long. Slowly she began to move her lips against the soft ones beneath her, her wildest fantasies couldn't hold up to the reality of kissing Catherine. The feel of her rosy lips against her own was indescribable. But those lips remained motionless as hers massaged and teased them, Sara realised she wasn't got any response and slowly began to pull back as the thought she had just probably gotten herself fired filtered through her brain when she felt the smallest of responses. Her lips were barely touching Catherine's when she felt a slight opening of Catherine's mouth. Smiling to herself she pressed her lips fully against Catherine's once again, this time she felt the woman in her arms shiver slightly. It was empowering feeling knowing that she had caused that.

Tentatively Catherine's lips moved against hers, slow and very very sensual. Nervous and unsure but very much involved in the kiss. Sara was on an incredible high from the kiss, it was everything she had ever imagined and more. Gently her tongue left her parted lips and fleetingly brushed against Catherine's full bottom lip. The quiet moan that greeted the movement sent her head spinning. How had she waited so long to do this? God, if Catherine killed her after it would be worth it. She would die incredibly happy.

Slipping her tongue into her mouth and exploring what she found there Sara moaned herself, Catherine tasted exquisite and the feel of her tongue dancing with her own was beyond erotic. Using her height to her advantage she hoisted the smaller woman up until her backside was perched on the edge of the vanity. Having Catherine fully at her mercy and tangling her tongue with hers was doing wonders to Sara's body. The fire that always seemed to burn in the pit of her stomach whenever she was around Catherine was now a raging inferno of desire and lust. Her whole body was alight with arousal, she could feel the thrumming between her legs letting her know she was ready and rearing to go.

Catherine's hands had now found purchase on her waist; she could feel the manicured nails digging into her flesh through the towel still wrapped around her now rapidly drying body. Her left hand brushed against her side as it made its way from her waist upwards. Before it reached its destination a loud ringing filled the room. Sara reluctantly broke the kiss and crossed the room to answer the phone, leaving Catherine sitting on the vanity with a dazed look on her face and desperately trying to pull much need oxygen into her deprived lungs.

"What?" she snapped into the phone.

"Your curtesy wakeup call ma'am."

"Right, great." She hung up without so much as a thank you, normally she would feel guilty for being so rude but right at this moment in time she just didn't care. She had been kissing Catherine fricking Willows and they had interrupted.

Turning back to face the room she found that Catherine had found her motor functions once again and was now stood with her back to her looking out of the window, arms firmly wrapped around her waist much like their first night in this room. Her defences were well and truly back up and whatever spell had been woven moments before was gone.

"Cat…" Sara started.

"You need to get dressed before we're late." Catherine's voice held no emotion at all.

Sighing softly Sara knew she wouldn't get through to her right at this moment, while she was so closed off, so she grabbed some clothes and went back into the bathroom to change. As she pulled her jeans over her hips she couldn't help wondering how far they would have gone if they hadn't been interrupted. She had no experience in an aroused Catherine but she had plenty of experience with other women and judging by Catherine's reactions to their kiss, she was very much into it.

She finished dressing and looked at herself in the mirror and made a decision, since she had already probably lost her job she might as well go the whole hog and actively pursue Catherine. She grinned at her reflection after her decision was made.

They met up with the boys shortly after in a diner they found that catered for Sara veggie needs. Once they were settled in their booth and all the food had been ordered Sara made sure the boys were distracted talking about the days schedule before she slipped her hand under the table and onto Catherine's jean clad thigh beside her. Feeling Sara's warm hand settle on her thigh Catherine jumped slightly and knocked the table with her knee, causing her coffee to spill onto the off-white table top. She jumped again to avoid the dark liquid quickly making its way towards her lap.

Nick, being the first to react, grabbed a stack of napkins and tossed them onto the coffee, the tissue instantly darkening as it soaked up the liquid.

"Jesus Cath, what happened?" Greg asked as Catherine's nervous eyes jumped from him to Sara. Sara, for her part, remained calm throughout and sat with a smirk on her face.

"I need the restroom." Catherine practically climbed over Sara in her attempt to get away from the table and make her escape to the restrooms located at the back of the diner.

The boys both turned their gazes to Sara who shrugged in response and sipped at her coffee.

When Catherine hadn't returned a few minutes later Sara got up to go check on her, leaving the boys to eat their pancakes.

Opening the door to the restroom she saw Catherine standing by the sinks wiping at some stray splashes of coffee on her jeans. Smirking to herself Sara made her way into the room, closing the door behind her quietly, and made her way over to Catherine. While she was distracted trying to clean her jeans as best she could Sara took the opportunity to step her game up and placed her hands on Catherine's hips while simultaneously pressing the length of her body against Catherine's back.

"You seem to have a little issue, let me help." Without waiting for a response she took the damp tissue from Catherine's hand and began to dab at the dark spots high on Catherine's thigh, her brown eyes meeting surprised blue ones in the mirror opposite.

One of her hands remained on Catherine's hip while the other worked on cleaning her jeans. Catherine seemed to have stop breathing and was staring at her in the mirror without a word, she didn't know whether to take it as a good sign or not. On one hand she wasn't pushing her away but on the other she wasn't pulling her in either. Breaking their locked gazes Sara lowered her lips to the tempting skin of Catherine's neck and tenderly brushed her lips against it. She flicked her eyes up to the mirror again without removing her lips from the delicious skin, what she saw made her entire being come alive. Catherine had closed her eyes, her bottom lip was between her teeth and her hands were clutching the sink.

Without a second thought she dropped the tissue, span Catherine around and pressed her against the counter while her lips hungrily sought out hers. Catherine kissed back without hesitation, her hands grasping at Sara's biceps while Sara's hand held her waist. Tongues mingled and duelled, lips moved against each other and moans were exchanged. Sara pulled her lips from Catherine's and kissed her way down her neck once again, Catherine tilted her head to expose more of the sensitive flesh to the other woman's wandering mouth.

Finding her pulse Sara ran her teeth along it causing Catherine to let out a whimper, Sara groaned herself. "God, I love that sound." She moved in again to do it again as her left hand cupped Catherine's breast through the fabric of her clothes. Before she had chance to go any further the sound of the bathroom door opening caused Catherine to hurriedly push Sara away.

Sara glanced at the person who had entered before looking back at Catherine, who had flushed a bright red colour, and went to take her hand to reassure her but Catherine quickly turned on her heel and marched out of the restroom. Quickly following her Sara grabbed her outside the door and turned her to face her.

"Hey, don't do this. Don't run."

"Let me go."

"Why? We need to talk."

"There's nothing to talk about." Catherine rapidly looked around her for a way to escape the situation.

"We kissed, Catherine. Twice. And I know you were into it."

"Drop it, Sara."

"Catherine, stop acting like a child. Why are you acting like this?"

"Because…"

"Because?"

"Because I'm not gay!" Catherine exclaimed before looking around them quickly to make sure nobody had heard.

Taking a step back Sara straightened up. "I never said you were. But you can be attracted to women without being completely gay, you could be bi."

Catherine's head spun to face her, her eyes narrowed and her jaw set. "Well I'm not." Now Sara had moved back she had room to escape around her and back into the diner, and she took it.

Sara watched her go with a sigh. She knew how difficult it was to accept ones true self and she didn't want to force Catherine but she also knew that Catherine was at least curious otherwise she wouldn't have moaned for Sara to continue not five minutes ago.

Shaking her head she followed her back out to the table but at a much slower pace. They were going to talk, sooner or later.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys, sorry for the slow updates on this story. On my last update I mentioned that two family members had been taken into hospital, well one of them unfortunately never made it out and passed away recently. So I've not really been in a very good place and I needed to sort myself out before I attempted to continue this.**

The rest of the day passed with Catherine avoiding Sara as much as she could without making it too obvious to Nick and Greg, letting them just assume that she was annoyed with Sara as was so often the case rather than the actual truth of what had happened. Sara knew what she was doing and despite her own feelings, which were to get Catherine alone and sort whatever this was out, she decided to leave Catherine alone and avoid any potential fights since they still had another two nights sharing a room. It'd be much easier to leave it all and move on if they weren't confined to one small hotel room. The last thing she needed was more hostility from Catherine, she'd had enough of that to last her a lifetime. So she had kept the peace when Catherine chose to sit between Greg and a stranger despite there being a perfectly empty seat between Sara and Greg. She made no comment when Catherine only nodded or muttered a one word answer whenever Sara tried to interact with her. And she had simply sighed when they had been left along together and Catherine had quickly left the room, very obviously trying to avoid any situation where Sara may try to talk about what was happening between them.

After the day's events Sara just wanted to go up to her room and climb into bed and forget about all of this. It was a stupid mistake to try and win Catherine over and now Catherine would hate her more than she already did. Her work life was going to be miserable now, especially if she was working a case with Catherine. She would forever know that Sara had a massive crush on her and often thought about kissing her. But she couldn't do that; she couldn't stay on her room and hide from the strawberry blonde for a few hours. They had all promised Greg they would hit this club he had heard about from one of his buddies and if she bailed now he would never let her hear the end of it. On the plus side, some hard liquor might help take her mind off of Catherine.

She'd changed in the bedroom while Catherine had taken her things into the bathroom to get ready for their evening out with the boys. She'd pulled on some black skinny jeans and a blue halter neck. Touched her face up with some tinted moisturiser, a couple of coats of mascara and a tinted lip balm. She left her hair to dry in its natural waves and added a bit of serum to calm the frizz. Now she was sat on her bed waiting for Catherine. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that Catherine's appearance wouldn't be as quick, Catherine liked to impress and judging by the amount of things she'd carried into the bathroom she was going all out tonight.

Sara leaned back against the headboard on her bed and stretched her legs out as she waited, thinking about the drink she knew she'd definitely need to get through this night if Catherine was going to be floating around all dressed up and gorgeous.

When Catherine finally emerged Sara was not prepared for Catherine's outfit choice and stopped breathing for a second as she soaked in the vision before her. Catherine had chosen a bodycon style black dress that hugged her body and accentuated her curves, it had a plunging neckline which Sara was quick to notice meant she was wearing no bra with the outfit and no back. There were ample amounts of skin on show but Catherine somehow managed to pull it off without looking trashy. If the dress wasn't enough to tip Sara over the edge she had on some killer heels that Sara was pretty certain she would break her neck in if she tried to stand let alone walk in them, yet Catherine seemed to have no problem as she sashayed her way across the room to the little vanity. She bent slightly to look better in the mirror and Sara had to bite her lip to not grown when the curve of Catherine's backside was displayed even more to her. The whole outfit was topped off with straightened hair that had been backcombed and tousled slightly to give it that "sexy just out of bed" look. She had smoky eyes with lashing of dark eyeliner and nude lips that looked even more pouty and fuller than normal. Catherine wasn't out to impress, she was out to kill.

And she was definitely doing that. Sara was finding it difficult to focus on anything but the way the dress clung to Catherin's body. Every curve drawing her in as her eyes roamed everywhere they possibly could.

Catherine turned so her back was to the mirror and looked over shoulder, checking everything looked okay from that angle and that nothing was showing that shouldn't be. After a final spin she picked up a small clutch bag off her bed and finally looked at Sara who was still sat on her bed watching her.

"We're late." Catherine said as she broke her glance from Sara and made her way to the door.

Sara jumped up off the bed and followed quickly, her eyes running over the expanse of skin the backless dress offered to her hungry eyes. It was creamy white with a smattering of freckles which Sara found incredibly sexy and cute. She wondered if the rest of Catherine's body had the same freckles, she wondered if the freckles were on her stomach, her legs, her breasts…before her thoughts could wander too far Nick's voice floated down the corridor to them as he and Greg stood waiting for the elevator. Greg noticed them first and whistled as he took in Catherine's appearance, making some comment about how hot she looked and if she was sure she didn't want to give him a private showing. Catherine, as per usual with Greg's antics, laughed softly and shook her head.

"Oh Greg, you wouldn't be able to keep up." With that she stepped onto the elevator which had just arrived and turned to wait for them all with a smile on her face. Greg stood with his jaw open slightly, Nick momentarily looked the same before he laughed and smacked Greg's shoulder and stepped onto the lift. Sara, she was busy wondering if the statement could be true. Was Catherine a wildcat in bed, would _she_ be able to keep up with her. "Close your mouth Greg, flies will land there." Catherine smiles turned into a laugh and the remaining two CSIs sparked back into life and stepped onto the elevator, nick pressed the button for the lobby.

The cab was waiting for them outside and they all got in, Sara seated between Nick and Greg in the back while Catherine took the front passenger seat. Sara, still mesmerised by Catherine, watched as she pulled the sun visor down to check her lipstick in the mirror hidden there. She watched as Catherine carefully wiped at the outer edge of her lip with her finger before she pouted slightly to check her lipstick one last time then changed the angle of the mirror to check the rest of her makeup. She saw the moment Catherine's eyes met hers in the reflective glass and the way Catherine's body seemed to still as she met her stare for stare. Sara's lips twitched into a small smile, which seemed to spark something in Catherine and she snapped the visor back up and looked out of her window, avoiding Sara once again.

They arrived at the club not long after and took their place in the line of people waiting to get inside. As they stood there Sara noticed more than a few men's gazes wandering over Catherine's curvaceous body. Right at that moment she wanted nothing more than to wrap her arm around Catherine's waist and pull her in close, possibly nuzzle her neck and whisper sweet things in her ear that would make Catherine smile or possibly blush. She wanted to stake her claim to be perfectly honest. But she knew it wouldn't be well received by the woman in question and would likely earn her a slap. It was one thing to test Catherine's limits in the privacy of their room and the restroom at the diner where it was semi private but it was something else entirely to do it in front of dozens of strangers and their co-workers. She was pretty certain it would earn her a slap of epic proportions and ruin any chance she might have with the confused redhead.

So she stood there and said nothing as the guys ogled Catherine, nudging their mates to have a look. All the while she felt that burning jealousy in her stomach, that annoying voice that reminded her that these guys, these idiots, probably stood more of a chance with Catherine than she did. It was a thought that haunted her often, every time she saw a man notice Catherine. Every time she heard Catherine had a new boyfriend. It pained her but there was nothing she could do. She had made her feelings clear to Catherine, now the ball was in her court.


	5. Chapter 5

**Let me start by apologising for how long it has been since I last updated. Two of my very close family members passed away in close succession to each other and I started a new job around the same time so everything has been a bit crazy in my personal life.**

They remained in line for more or less half an hour before the doorman stepped aside and it was their turn to enter through the dark doorway and into the pounding music that had been filtering its way outside. Now inside it was even louder, it certainly wasn't a place for a quiet drink and a chat. Which suited Sara just fine, she wanted to get washed away in the music and alcohol and forget how she had potentially fucked up her entire life.

With a quick glance around the place she located the bar and made a beeline for it, not bothering to check if the others were following, and squeezed her way through the people until she was stood between two guys who were also waiting to get served. Positioning herself so she could flag down the bartender she felt a hand on her shoulder and turned her head to see Nick stood behind her.

"Greg and Cath have gone to find a table; they asked if you could get them a beer and a pornstar martini?"

Sara's lips twitched into a smirk.

"The cocktails for Greg, right?"

Laughing Nick shook his head.

"Greg's more of a daiquiri gal." He teased back making Sara's smirk turn into a full blown smile.

"And what can I get for the Texan gent?"

Smiling Nick gave her his order of a beer before turning back to face the club and scanning it to find Catherine and Greg.

"This place is heaving, we'll be lucky if we find a table."

Sara held her hand up to get the bartender's attention. "Catherine will sweet talk some poor unsuspecting soul into giving theirs up." She sighed as the bartender stopped to serve someone else a few paces away from where she stood.

"Looking like she does tonight, she won't have a problem," he continued his search for the other two members of their group. "But we might, I can't see them for shit."

"We'll worry about that when I manage to get our drinks." She made another unsuccessful attempt at flagging down the bartender. "Which at this rate could be hours. Besides we'll just follow the line of drooling men, they'll lead us straight to them."

Nick noted the tone of her voice and glanced at her, brushing it off as another one of their spats. Everyone knew they had once or twice fallen out over Catherine using her femininity, which Nick thought was the case tonight.

Finally Sara caught the bartender's attention and placed their drinks order before her phone beeped, she pulled it out and read the text she had received.

"They're by the stairs." She told Nick over her shoulder as she slipped her phone back into her pocket and paid for the drinks.

Carrying the tray that held their drinks Sara followed Nick as he made a path for her through the crowds of people, making sure she didn't get knocked along the way, towards where the other two were waiting. They'd found a small table with just enough chairs for the four of them. It was tucked in the shadows down the side of the stairs that led to the upper level. The location offering them a place with just enough privacy but also gave them a good view of the dance floor where numerous bodies bumped and grinded their way through the music.

Reaching the table Sara placed the tray containing the drinks down on the slight sticky surface and wiped her hands on her jeans before taking a seat in the only empty chair left. Everyone grabbed their drinks and watched the bodies moving to the beat for a few moments. Sara noticed Catherine moving in her chair; seemingly dancing to the music without realising she was doing it. Greg noticed Catherine's dancing too and, making Sara feel like a coward for not plucking up the courage herself, asked Catherine if she'd like to go and dance. She readily accepted his offer and they both headed out to join the throngs of peoples already out there. Sara remained seated and pounded the drinks while Catherine danced the night away with various suitors.

By around her third, or maybe fourth she couldn't remember, Catherine had been dancing with the same guy for the past couple of songs, her body moving against his in ways that made Sara's own body burn with jealousy. She knew she was making herself feel worse but she couldn't take her eyes off of them. The way Catherine's body moved, the way he touched her, the way she let him touch her. All of it conspired to create a burning sensation in Sara's stomach. Or was that the alcohol?

Her thoughts raced as she watched his hands slide down Catherine's back and cup her ass, giving it a good squeeze as he did. Her internal voice screamed at her. That should be her dancing with Catherine, that should be her touching her in those ways, that should be her that Catherine was pressed up against. And it should be her that was whispering in Catherine's ear and making her throw her head back and laugh, the light dancing in her eyes as she did. She raised the bottle in front of her and took a long swig, her eyes never leaving the couple causing her such inner turmoil.

She knew what Catherine was doing. She knew it was Catherine's way of trying to reassure herself that she wasn't gay, her way of wiping everything that had happened between them and pretending it had never happened. But despite knowing, and having done it herself a few times, it still hurt. Her chest burned and she had an overwhelming desire to vomit when she saw Catherine and her new play thing approaching the table. Her fist tightened around her bottle of beer as they got closer and she noted his hand was still touching Catherine's body.

The couple reached the table and Sara wanted to wipe the smug smile off his face as Catherine picked her drink up and took a sip. She didn't bother to introduce herself, the fire burning inside her was raging too hot to even attempt to be pleasant, and Catherine made no attempt to introduce them either. In fact, she didn't even look at Sara as she took hold of his hand and pulled him back out onto the dance floor, throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her breasts against his chest, much to his delight. Another round of torture for Sara with kissing included this time for an extra kick in the gut.

She couldn't stand the way his hands were all over Catherine as their lips moved against each other. She couldn't believe Catherine actually enjoyed such public displays that were bordering on being inappropriate. Of course she knew Catherine wasn't shy, she'd known all about Catherine's stripper past and had even heard of some of her exploits with Eddie via the rumour mill but for some reason she had always thought that it was all an act. That deep down she desired the comfort of a steady relationship, the love and private moments. But perhaps she had been wrong.

"Cats wasting no time" Greg commented making Sara's stomach churn.

She desperately wanted this night to end, watching the woman she had feelings for draping herself all over some guy was playing havoc with her heart. Of course it had always hurt to see Catherine with someone but now Catherine knew how she felt; it made the pain all that much worse. Her mind was a whir of jealous thoughts that she was trying very hard not to say out loud. A battle she would lose if she kept drinking at the rate she currently was.

"Good for her, she deserves to blow off some steam." Nick replied before adding "maybe more than steam will be blowed tonight."

Sara, feeling the inferno inside her kick up a notch rolled her eyes and scoffed, something that didn't get missed by the other occupants at the table.

"Something wrong, Sara?" Nick spoke carefully, fully aware of how volatile she could be.

Her eyes left the dancing couple briefly to look at Nick, her face a mask of emotions.

"Well it's just a bit sleazy don't you think? Picking up some random guy and giving him everything."

"You never had a one night stand?" Her eyes turned to Greg, a flash of fire burning behind the brown before she looked away and back to the couple who were now attracting a fair bit of attention with their show.

"All I'm saying is she should be careful with who she sleeps with. Maybe know the guy for more than an hour before she drops her panties." She raised her beer and downed the rest of the liquid from the bottle.

"Hey guts," Catherine's voice drifted over the table, her approach completely missed during Sara's speech. Her eyes swept over the quiet table. "Well I'm heading out."

Sara's heart bottomed out at her words, the noise of the club dulled being replaced by the pounding of her own heart. The beat getting faster and louder. She could see Catherine's lips moving as she continued to speak but the words passed by Sara unheard, getting lost in the dark shadows. How could she be seriously considering leaving with this guy? He was clearly only after a lay.

Her eyes darted over Catherine's features as her mind tried to comprehend what was happening, what Catherine could possibly be thinking by actually leaving with him. She caught sight of his smug smiling face over Catherine's shoulder; he clearly thought he'd won the lottery bagging a woman like Catherine. He was standing a few feet away clearly waiting for Catherine to say her goodbyes so he could take her away to have his way with her. Suddenly Sara had an overwhelming rage take control of her body and she couldn't keep it inside any longer.

"You're making a mistake."

Before she could say anymore Catherine, seemingly ignoring Sara, grabbed her purse off the table and turned to leave.

"You don't need to do this to prove anything." Sara's voice rose to get Catherine's attention.

Catherine, whether worried Sara would reveal what had happened between them she didn't know, whirled around to face her, her hair whipping around at the sudden movement. Her eyes were smouldering with anger.

"I'm not proving anything." Her eyes moved to pointedly look at the amount of beer bottles in front of Sara. "You might want to lay off the beer and find yourself someone to unwind with." Without another word she walked back to the waiting guy and linked arms with him, he led Catherine out of the club with a hand on her ass.

Sara fumed in her seat, her hand tightly grasping the now empty bottle of beer. Coming out had been a massive mistake and all she wanted right now was to crawl between the sheets of her bed back in Vegas. Her safe haven that was untouched by all this, where she could wallow in her self-pity without an audience.

"He's an ass, probably a two pump chump." She muttered to herself as she picked at the label on the bottle.

She reached for the last remaining bottle and took a swallow despite Catherine's parting words. She needed to have just enough of a buzz she could fall to sleep without her brain being cohesive enough to plague her with thoughts of what Catherine was up to. Of how the smug prick was getting to kiss her creamy white skin as he removed her clothes to reveal her naked form. Of how Catherine would clutch the bedsheets in pleasure as he thrust himself into her over and over again until they reached climax. She shook her head to attempt to rid her mind of the thoughts.

She stayed another thirty minutes before her senses kicked in and she knew she needed to go back to her room and call it a night, before she drank too much and did something really stupid. She bid her farewells to the guys, who were going to stay for a bit longer, and headed back to the hotel.

Her feet were heavy as she walked down the long corridor heading towards her room, she toyed with the key card eyeing the door as she slowly approached wondering what she was going to do if Catherine had decided to take the guy back to their room in some kind of twisted scoring game of 'look at me, definitely not lesbian now'. Or how much it would hurt if the room was empty and knowing the reason why. Her imagination could be worse than reality sometimes and she had no doubt it would run wild with what they were potentially doing.

Standing outside the door she took a breath to prepare herself and unlocked the door. The room was dark and so far there was no sound from inside. Stepping inside she closed the door behind her and flipped the light on as she tossed the key card onto the drawers, as she turned to head to the bathroom she almost jumped out of her skin. Sat on the bed in silence with her hands between her knees watching her in silence was Catherine.

Settling her nerves again Sara kicked off her boots. "That was quick." She couldn't help herself, she was hurt and her first line of defence was to lash out.

Catherine remained silent but something about the vibe of the room caught Sara's attention and she looked across the room at Catherine, actually taking notice of the woman and seeing the smudged black mascara under her eyes leaving little tear tracks down her face.

"Cat?" Without a seconds thought she was over to the bed and kneeling on the ground in front of Catherine. "Did he hurt you?"

Wiping under her eyes with the back of her hand Catherine shook her head no.

"Why are you crying? What's happened?"

Taking a shaking breath Catherine's eyes darted at everywhere but Sara. "You win."

"I win? What do I win?" Sara's voice was laced with confusion.

"Everything. This." Catherine waved her right arm around.

"Cat, you're not making sense. Are you feeling okay? Did he give you anything?"

"I'm not drugged up, Sara." For the first time her eyes met Sara's. "I couldn't do it. Are you happy? I couldn't sleep with him."

Sara's breath left her body in a slow exhale, all the tension leaving her at the revelation that Catherine hadn't slept with the guy.

"I went back to his room, we were on the bed making out and…" Catherine blew out a breath, almost like she was nervous to reveal what had happened. "He was kissing my neck and his hand…he was touching my breast and all I could see," she stopped talking and took great interest in her hands.

"Go on." Sara coaxed, her hands finding anchor on Catherine's knees.

Catherine's head tilted slightly as she studied the placement of Sara's hands on her body before she started talking again. "It was you. It was you kissing me and touching me like you did before. But it wasn't. It felt all wrong. His hands were too big, too rough. The touches weren't right, they weren't…good."

Sara felt a smug satisfaction at Catherine's revelation but she didn't let it show, the poor woman was clearly battling with some big stuff and she didn't need Sara dancing around with glee.

"So what did you do?"

"I left and came back here," her eyes connected with Sara's again. "And waited for you." Her voice was soft, her blue eyes swimming with all the emotions of the day.

Sara reached her right hand up and traced her thumb along Catherine's jaw, all the way up to her ear. She cupped the back of Catherine's neck and slowly rose on her knees until her lips were mere millimetres from Catherine's, waiting for that show of approval that this was what she wanted. And there it was, Catherine's lips parted ever so slightly and her head tilted slightly to the right. In the next second they were kissing.

This time it was different to the other kisses they had shared. This time Catherine was immediately responsive and kissing back with a passion Sara was sure would drown her. Sara's left hand left Catherine's knee and made a slow approach up her thigh, skimming over the material of her dress as it climbed higher and higher until it reached her hip and found purchase there. She moved her body closer causing Catherine's body to lower to the bed with Sara's following until they were both lay sideways across the mattress making out like a couple of teenagers.

The sounds Catherine was making and the way her hands were roaming Sara's back were dizzying. Her hand left the back of Catherine's neck and skimmed all the way down her back until she reached her ass; the tips of her fingers ghosted over the delicious curve and found the hem of her dress. She ran the tips of her fingers lightly under the hem over the backs of her thighs causing the Catherine to moan and nip at her bottom lip.

Sara knew things were quickly getting out of control and pretty soon she wouldn't be able to stop. And as much as she had dreamed about what sex with Catherine would be like she didn't want to take her lady loving virginity on a night where she had tanked more than a few beers and Catherine had almost slept with a guy. She wanted them to both be clear headed and one hundred percent certain that they wanted it. So reluctantly she pulled her lips from Catherine's and took a few calming breaths, something she saw Catherine herself doing.

Their faces were still very close and hands were still touching bodies but she'd taken the first step, she wasn't sure she could stop altogether right now.

"Sara," Catherine's voice was barely a whisper. "I don't know what I'm doing; I've never done this before…" Her fingers were toying with the back of Sara's top, clearly unsure of what to do next.

Catherine's nerves made Sara smiled and she gently kissed her forehead. "Relax; nothing is going to happen tonight."

"It isn't?" Catherine's head pulled back slightly so she could look in Sara's eyes. "I thought this was what was happening here."

"If we hadn't stopped kissing then it most probably would have but I want to take my time with you. I want it to be something you're absolutely sure you want, something you will remember forever."

"Do you think I could forget making out with my female co-worker?" Her face held a smirk.

"Oh shut up," Sara's own face held a matching smirk. "Now you really need to stop that before I lose the little grasp of control I have." She said referring to the way Catherine was lightly scratching the small of her back.

They dragged themselves apart reluctantly and Catherine headed into the bathroom to get ready for bed while Sara changed into some shorts and a baggy tee, grinning like a madman the whole time.

She was in bed by the time Catherine emerged; she looked over to the woman standing in the bathroom doorway and groaned.

"Damn woman, are you purposefully trying to test me?" Catherine stood there looking all kinds of wonderful in her mid-thigh silk nightdress with lace trim, her golden hair framing her face and falling to her shoulders in soft waves.

At Sara's comment Catherine ran her hands over the nightdress causing the fabric to cling to her curves even more. "You like?"

"A gay man would like that." Sara's comment caused Catherine to laugh. "Now get that cute little butt over here."

Catherine walked to Sara's bed with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you said nothing was going to happen tonight?"

Sara raised the covers as Catherine climbed into the small bed beside her, letting them fall over Catherine's body before replying. "That doesn't mean we can't have a bit of fun."

Catherine squirmed and let out a soft moan as Sara's lips attached themselves to Catherine's neck and her hand reached out to turn out the lamp, plunging them into darkness filled only with the sounds of pleasure.


	6. Chapter 6

**I know it's been a ridiculously long time since I updated and I can only apologise for this. Since my last post when I informed you all I had lost 2 family members I lost another so things haven't been that great personally but I recently had a spark of inspiration to continue this so here we go.**

Sara blinked open her sleepy eyes, the rising sun creeping through the open curtains and casting light throughout the hotel room. With everything that had happened the night before she hadn't even thought whether the curtains were closed or not and gave a silent thanks to whatever beings there may be that they were on the fifth floor and therefore harder to be seen by any prying eyes in the outside world. They had been so wrapped up in each other she doubted they would have even noticed if someone had been stood with their nose pressed against the glass waving at them, in that moment nothing could have pulled her away from Catherine's enticing body. She watched the light outside getting brighter for a few moments and thought about everything that had happened in recent days, focusing particularly on last night and the way Catherine had felt as she had ran her hands teasingly over her body. A smile spread across her face at the memories and she turned her gaze to the woman still sleeping softly next to her, her body curled up in the small space the single bed allowed. Her hair was a tangled mess of curls falling across the pillow and partially covering her face obscuring Sara's view, the blankets were half covering her body and one leg was out and over the covers as if she had gotten hot but not hot enough to warrant removing the covers completely.

Sara's thoughts trailed back to the night before once again as she admired Catherine's beauty. While she had stayed true to her word and they hadn't had sex they had had a pretty heavy make out session in which she had made Catherine moan in the most delicious way more than once, one particular occasion being when she had used the tips of her fingers to trail over the insides of Catherine's thighs in intricate patterns. Her stomach fluttered and contracted at the memory of the way Catherine had arched her back slightly, moaned her name in a whisper and dug her nails into her biceps when she had done that. But it wasn't just her that had driven Catherine crazy with desire; Catherine had also driven her crazy! She might claim to not know what she was doing with a woman but she definitely knew how to get Sara's engine revving. It was no secret she was a sexual woman and Sara had gotten a taster of it, she barely had to do anything and Sara had been spiralling into orbit. It wasn't that she did anything specific to Sara, she had clearly still been nervous about the whole situation and her hands were a little unsure when she had been touching Sara but the way she responded to Sara's touches was very erotic. She wasn't shy to voice her pleasure, to ask for what she wanted and damn her nails were vicious but in a good way. Sara especially liked when she buried her face into Sara's neck and whispered in her ear. And dammit the woman was a phenomenal kisser, just her kisses alone nearly had Sara reaching the pinnacle but she had managed to control herself, even when Catherine had begged "please" into her ear when she had been stroking her stomach just above her panty line.

Her thoughts swirled in her head in an arousing swirl as she continued to watch Catherine sleep. On one hand last night had been absolutely fantastic but she really didn't want Catherine to wake up and regret what she had done, after all it had been a night filled with alcohol and Catherine had tried to sleep with a guy. She didn't have long to let her thoughts wander too far into the what ifs before Catherine started to wake up, her body curled up slightly as she tried to fight her way through the stages of waking up and her nose crinkled in the most adorable way making Sara smile at the sight. Unable to resist she leaned forward and placed her lips to Catherine's forehead in a sweet good morning kiss, instantly Catherine froze making Sara's hank sink. Her fears were becoming real and Catherine really did regret last night, it had been alcohol and bad decisions that had led her to Sara's arms. Sara didn't know if she could take her rejection now she had had a taster of what it would be like to be with her, before it had been easier when everything was a fantasy but now it was damn near impossible to get over such a woman. Fighting to remain calm she pulled back and watched Catherine's face, her eyes opened and she met Sara's with a wary expression which disappeared almost immediately replaced with a smile.

"Oh thank god!"

"Excuse me?" Sara wasn't sure what on earth to think right at that moment.

Catherine smiled wider and moved closer, tucking her head under Sara's chin and trailing her fingers along Sara's arm. "I had this horrible thought that last night had all been a dream and I was actually in bed with him."

Sara relaxed and smiled herself, she placed her hand on Catherine's exposed thigh and pulled her leg to rest over hers, wanting to be as close as possible. "It's all real," she kissed the crown of Catherine's head. "You had me worried for a minute there." Tilting her head back Catherine looked at her questioningly. "I thought you were having second thoughts."

Realisation dawned and Catherine found Sara's hand with her own and laced their fingers together "no second thought." She raised their joined hands and kissed the back of Sara's "this scares the shit out of me and I'm completely out of my depth here but I think if I tried to deny it any longer id have gone stir crazy. You Miss Sidle know how to make a lasting impression."

Sara smiled smugly and her chocolate brown eyes danced listening to the words leaving Catherine's mouth. "Yeah?"

Catherine rolled her eyes and lightly smacked Sara's arm "stop fishing for compliments and give me a proper kiss"

Sara responded to her command instantly and placed her lips to Catherine's soft ones, she briefly wondered how Catherine's lips were so soft but that thought was quickly replaced with nothingness as she lost herself into the moment. They shared a few sweet but passion filled kisses before the alarm went off and they had to drag themselves out of bed to get ready for the day, although it took Sara a bit longer as she put her arms behind her head and admired Catherine's physique as she wandered the room gathering the things she needed to get ready for the day. Her eyes were admiring the curve of Catherine's butt when she turned around and quirked her eyebrow making Sara grin innocently, shaking her head Catherine tossed a hairbrush at Sara's legs.

"Stop staring and get ready."

Lifting the hairbrush Sara placed it on the bedside table and sat up "I can't help it if you're devastatingly gorgeous."

Catherine tossed a grin in Sara's direction at the compliment. "Well if that's the case I better change in the bathroom, wouldn't want my devastatingly gorgeousness to distract you now." And with that she walked into the bathroom and shut the door listening to Sara's protests through the wood.

"Hey! I wasn't complaining."

Catherine just chuckled and turned the shower on, the last thing she heard before the noise of running water took over being a frustrated "fuck."


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys, another chapter for you and it didn't take as long as the last one. I hope you enjoy and don't forget to review.**

The remainder of their time at the conference passed quickly with the women trying to keep their new relationship hidden. Well at least when out in public, in the privacy of their own room it was a different matter entirely. They spent their time getting to know each other. Despite having worked together almost daily for years they had never really talked about their lives. Sara had learnt during one conversation that Catherine's family had a ranch up in the mountains, a place where she had spent a good portion of her childhood when she needed to get away from her mother. Her 'grams' and 'pops', as she had referred to them, had always welcomed her with open arms but she had lost control of her life in her late teens. She discovered boys, parties and clubs which then led to stripping and a cocaine addiction. She didn't visit her grandparents again after that; she was too ashamed to face their disappointment in her. When Sara had questioned why she hadn't visited them now she was older and her life was good she had wiped a tear from her cheek and said,

"Too much time has passed."

Despite Sara wanting to dispute this statement the relationship was still very fresh and she hadn't wanted to push it so instead she had pulled Catherine against her chest and held her while she worked through the emotions the memories had brought to the surface.

As well as talking there had been some pretty damn good make out sessions, and no matter how heavy they had gotten Sara had maintained that they wouldn't rush into having sex. After one particular time Sara had pulled away when Catherine had almost been begging her, the blonde had asked her why she wouldn't sleep with her; Sara had looked her dead in the eyes and replied "before we make love I want you to know that I am in this for you, not your body. Granted it's a very good body and one that is hard to resist but I want to know you." She had tucked some hair behind Catherine's ear before continuing. "I want us to be friends before lovers."

Catherine had smiled softly, lightly pecked Sara on the lips and stood straightening her skirt out.

"Where are you going?" Sara had asked watching her movements.

"I'm going to shower; you can't kiss a girl like that and leave her high and dry." She had winked at her slack jawed companion before going into the bathroom for the next 45 minutes, leaving Sara's mind to play havoc thinking of what she had been doing in there.

Now they were getting ready to leave for the airport, Catherine was zipping her suitcase while Sara did a last minute sweep of the room to check they hadn't forgotten anything. Catherine glanced over as Sara got on all fours to check under the beds and smirked.

"I've got to admit, the view here is pretty phenomenal." She quipped tilting her head and admiring Sara's jeans encased rear.

"Really? Parking structures aren't really up there for me." Sara's strained voice replied as she reached her arm under the bed, oblivious to Catherine's admiration.

Catherine shook her head and laughed at the comment. Freeing herself from the bed Sara's head popped up and looked over the mattress at her amused friend.

"What?" she queried.

"Nothing, don't worry about it." Catherine chuckled and lifted her suitcase from the bed. "Are we ready to go or do you need to inspect the air vents?" she quirked an amused eyebrow.

"If I hadn't checked the room I wouldn't have found this would I, oh wise one?" Sara stood and walked over to where Catherine was waiting with her hip resting against the vanity, she held her hand out to see what Sara had found.

Sara continued to smile that cocky grin and dropped the delicate silver anklet Catherine had been wearing the night she had gotten over her fears and admitted to Sara she felt something too.

"It must have fallen off during the kissing."

Catherine closed her hand around the anklet, a matching smirk appearing on her face.

"Sure, it was the kissing that did it and not anything to do with you feeling me up like a horny teenager."

"Hey! I heard no complaints," Sara took a step closer and another until there was but a slither of air between their bodies. "In fact if I recall you was a very willing participant." She placed her hands on Catherine's hips. "Besides, I didn't feel up any of the good parts." Her voice dropped a notch and her lips descended on Catherine's.

Their lips had barely touched when loud knocking pulled them reluctantly apart; Sara cast an apologetic smile to her before moving to the door and opening it to reveal Greg and Nick with their suitcases.

"Ready to go, ladies?" Nick queried.

Catherine pulled her case to the door passing by Sara.

"If Sara's finished inspecting the room like a bloodhound then yeah." She quipped as she walked out into the corridor laughing at Sara's protests.

In the cab on the way to the airport Sara, while wedged in the back between nick and Greg, watched Catherine's reflection in the pulled down visor. She was wearing little makeup and she was glowing. Sara liked to think it was because of her. She was so lost in her admiration she didn't notice Nick moving until his face appeared in her vision trying to see what had captured her attention so intently.

"Whatcya looking at?" He asked just as Catherine's eyes lifted and connected with Sara's in the mirror.

Sara whipped her head around to face nick almost knocking heads with him due to his closeness.

"Jeez Sara!" he commented quickly moving back to avoid a collision.

Catherine's shoulders shook with restrained giggles as Sara ranted about personal space. She clearly hadn't had an issue with it when Catherine had practically been sprawled all over her that morning in bed. In fact, she had been pulling her closer. She now knew Sara was a very loving, caring and passionate person, it just depended on the person she was with and so far it seemed with lovers she was all about the cuddles and closeness.

As she continued to rant and try to get more space Catherine turned in her seat to face the three of them.

"Play nice children." All three of them striated talking at once, trying to explain or complain. "Stop." Catherine closed her eyes against the barrage of irritated voices and held up her hand. "We've managed to get along all week, just a few more hours and then we can all go our separate ways for a few hours."

Sara's eyes met hers when she opened them at the end of her speech, her lips twitching into a smirk before "okay boss" left her lips.

The rest of the journey passed without further incident and soon they were on the plane back to Vegas, Catherine had a magazine she had picked up before boarding and was looking through it at all the latest fashion trends when Sara turned from the window and faced her.

"Any plans when you get home?"

Catherine continued scanning the pages as she replied.

"A hot bubble bath, bed and an afternoon with my daughter before work."

"Oh, sounds good." Something in Sara's voice caught her attention and she lifted her attention from the magazine and looked at her.

"Why?"

"No reason."

"Sar."

"Honestly, it's nothing. I just thought we could maybe grab some food or something but you need to see your daughter. Its fine." She smiled softly as she finished explaining.

"I really need to spend some times with Linds but I would love to grab coffee on the way to work and if you happen to be there too I wouldn't complain." She placed a hand on Sara's thigh discreetly and smiled.

Sara smiled at her response and laced her fingers with Catherine's.

"I can't wait to take you on a proper date." The brunette stated.

"You want to take me on dates? And here I thought you were a beer and chips girl." She teased making Sara laugh low.

"Oh I am but I like to spoil my girlfriends."

As that word left her lips Catherine's face changed.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Sara asked.

"You think of me as your girlfriend?" Catherine asked quietly.

"Well that's what I'm hoping you'll be. Is that not what you wanted?" Sara's tone came out a little harsher than she intended but given that she now thought she'd got the wrong idea about what all this was she was feeling a little irritated. Hell, she was pissed with herself for opening her heart to someone so quickly.

"No, I do. I just," Catherine pushed her bangs back and took a breath. "I hadn't thought of it like that until now. I guess back there, at the hotel, it felt like another world. A fantasy world. And now, it's real." She took another breath and looked at her hands now resting on the magazine.

"Do you want it to be real? "Sara's voice was quiet, almost dreading the answer.

A few nerve wracking moments passed before Catherine's soft voice replied.

"Yeah, I think I do." Her eyes met Sara's and she smiled. "I want to see what dating Sara is like."

Sara smiled back relieved.

"Well them, you better be sure because once we land I am going to woo the pants off you."

Catherine started to laugh.

"Woo? Who even says woo anymore?"

Sara lightly smacked her arm causing her laughter to increase.

"Me. Now shut up and accept your girlfriend's quirks."

"Oh I accept them, doesn't stop me mocking them thought." Catherine continued to laugh.

"You're going to be a pain in my ass aren't you?" Sara remarked dryly.

"Yep and you're going to love it."

"I know." Sara replied and grinned at the beautiful woman next to her.

 **Don't forget to review guys.**


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